Posted in Crushes Gone Wrong, Life

CRUSHES GONE WRONG: Living in Denial.

This one is from Cynthia also known as Cyndy. Here she narrates her escapades on finding love and waiting for its acknowledgement while in Secondary School.

These were written in her words, no edits. Just as she sent it in.

If you can relate with your secondary school crush, say hi and leave your comment below.

Hmm… Taking myself to my early teen days, I had moved to a new school with expectations of making new beautiful Yoruba friends, putting into consideration my parents and their strictness, guys were exempted from my expectations.

But then I was caught up, yeah… I was caught!

I found myself wanting to go to school very early, wanting to be present at Further Maths classes even when the topics were so boring.

I had found chants beneath the boredom __don’t stress your thoughts please, I had found a crush (as called), my self had whispered “you’re definitely in love”… I was craay enough to believe myself.

He wasn’t what I’d call my type I knew yet I found myself tripping, attending classes I wasn’t meant to attend, leaving classes each time I found my so-called crush outside, I found myself trying to convince my parents allow me attend extra classes.

Was I even in love?  I’d always ask myself, I think I had a stronger demon who’d always mildly say “oh, yeah, you are”

I was living in denial, yeah I was.

I found myself talking and replying in front of my mirror, Sneaked to cafe to learn punchlines online so Incase my long dreamt dream happens I’d be able to deliver,

I found myself wanting to talk to everyone around me about how I felt, Found myself writing hidden love letters without headings.

I don’t know if it was over those chai-sutta breaks or there so, but I know I liked him just a little bit more everyday

I saw him look at me more than once, he’d steal glances,  this grew  tingling sensations, I was beginning to think it was true. I decided not to tell him, or do anything about it, because that was the right thing to do..(I thought)

I lived with my silent thought for few years, my eyes had cleared, just when the bad announcement came in… I was leaving my school, I was relocating to another state with my family,

I was gonna live forever without setting my eyes on my crush again, Maybe my learnt punchlines are now useless, I thought to myself.

I wish life had played out differently. I wish I’d had the guts to own up to my feelings, because now all I have is a memory of the good times.

Follow Cyndy here

If you loved this, please like and don’t forget to send in your stories via my DM on any of my profiles on my Social Media handles below. Or send me a mail at thisisugonna@gmail.com.

Love xx ❤❤

Author:

Hello. Welcome to my blog. This is where I let out my anger and frustration in other not to become a nuisance to the world. So let’s say it’s a win-win. Now, we can all hold hands and sing 'kumbaya'. Thanks for visiting, and I really hope you enjoyed it. Well, it’s not like you really have much of a choice hey. Love xx.

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